Louisville
Such amazing friends. Such wonderful family.
I hadn't driven in three-and-a-half months, but I took to it again easily. Just strange to cover that much ground so quickly, and to actually be in control of the movement. Strange to hear English everywhere. Strange to wake up and realize I know this city like the back of my hand.
I'm home, but that feeling is quickly fading. Most people don't feel "home" or "healthy" unless they miss such things. Now, occassionally, I'll think "Jesus, I'm home"... then "Jesus, I actually did that." And my brain is tempted to think of it all like it was a distant dream. Many times, it's as if I never left.
But that just isn't so. It happened; I was there. And I don't quite feel like the man who left Louisville, even if I don't quite feel like the man who returned. Either way, I don't want to fully adjust to this. I can be comfortable while still feeling a little alien... I was once a teenager, after all.
I love you all. And I thank you all. More than once, the comments -- or just knowing someone might be following this quest -- would keep me going. And this has reminded me that the journey wasn't just for myself.
So I'm equal parts disbelief, gratitude, and assimilation. Not bad. Not bad at all.
I hadn't driven in three-and-a-half months, but I took to it again easily. Just strange to cover that much ground so quickly, and to actually be in control of the movement. Strange to hear English everywhere. Strange to wake up and realize I know this city like the back of my hand.
I'm home, but that feeling is quickly fading. Most people don't feel "home" or "healthy" unless they miss such things. Now, occassionally, I'll think "Jesus, I'm home"... then "Jesus, I actually did that." And my brain is tempted to think of it all like it was a distant dream. Many times, it's as if I never left.
But that just isn't so. It happened; I was there. And I don't quite feel like the man who left Louisville, even if I don't quite feel like the man who returned. Either way, I don't want to fully adjust to this. I can be comfortable while still feeling a little alien... I was once a teenager, after all.
I love you all. And I thank you all. More than once, the comments -- or just knowing someone might be following this quest -- would keep me going. And this has reminded me that the journey wasn't just for myself.
So I'm equal parts disbelief, gratitude, and assimilation. Not bad. Not bad at all.
posted by Ghostwind | 9:23 PM
4 Comments:
hey I'm living proof you actually did it!
don't worry, I'll remember that also for you.
ehehe.
Gotta love Da Ville.
Represent south end!
My Dearest Son,
I am so grateful you are home. Right now you seem to be assimilating your journey, catching up with friends, etc., and I am keeping a distance to give you your space. But how glad I am to have you back here with me.
Perhaps the journey is more who we become in the process.... I just know that you are a good man, with nothing to prove nor to explain.
Thank you for accepting me as your father.
With love,
D
ET phone home.
Mom
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